Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Last-minute Blessings

I'm in the process of packing up my stuff to get ready for my move in a few weeks and I've been unearthing quite a few things that have brought back tons of memories and tons of laughs. One thing I seem to have a surplus of is notebooks, notepads and journals. One I recorded interview notes from my active journalism days. Ones I wrote down plays or Biblical vignettes for church. And of course, the journals with all my thoughts and dreams.


I found my most recent journal. The last entry was dated a year ago.



It's incomplete. I'm not sure why I never finished it. Although, it doesn't really surprise me that I didn't. But reading over this last entry made me smile...

A year ago, I was offered my teaching job at YES. And much like with my magazine job, it all worked out at the last-minute. A blessing poured out when I was ready to give up.

The job at CURE came right on the heels of my internship with the Dallas Morning News. I remember, it was the beginning of my last week and I got a Facebook message from E-beth. Somehow she'd found me and she asked if I'd be interested in applying for the editorial assistant position. It was a job. In journalism. For a magazine. In Texas. Uh... yeah. An interview was set up on my last day at the Dallas Morning News. A week later, I had the job.

God knows I was thankful. I had been praying that something would come up. I had no clue what I'd do after the internship ran its course. Would I move back to Houston and bum around my sister's? Would I even stay in Texas? What would I do? As that last day drew closer and closer, I felt more and more desperate. But He stepped in. Offered me such a blessing at what felt like the very last minute.

And then I lost that blessing. There are days when I feel like I know what happened, what went wrong, and other days when I feel like it all doesn't add up. It's confusing. To know in some ways, it's your fault (and maybe all your fault), but also feeling the overwhelming unfairness. I remember starting this blog, trying to pick up the pieces, but also feeling like I wouldn't be given another chance. There would be no more last-minute blessings.

But I guess that's the best thing about serving a God full of mercy and grace. Because last summer came another last-minute blessing. Two really. First, the offer to work for Teach for America during its Houston Institute. Second, interviewing and getting my job at YES.

Thinking about it now, I'm surprised I didn't write about it here. I'm surprised I didn't finish writing about it in my journal. Because it really was such a crazy, out of nowhere blessing. It was, again, my last week. The Institute was wrapping up and I was ready to go back to Dallas. And all the same questions were there: What would happen next? Where would I go? Would I find something soon?

A friend mentions her school director is looking for a social studies teacher and offers to e-mail him for me. He e-mails me and sets up a casual phone interview. Which leads to me going to teach a sample lesson and have a formal interview.

God worked a bit faster this time. I didn't have to wait a week. Not even a day. I was offered the position within hours after making it home and replaying it all in my head, hoping and praying for the best.

While I hate the waiting process, and it can often be painful and frustrating, seeing that journal entry and being reminded of last year reminded me of this: The blessing might feel last-minute, but He's really just right on time.

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