Faith, Hope, and Love

... I quit the YMCA. ...  I did not take that job . It just wasn't the right fit for me. ... I did not successful complete NaNoWriMo . I didn't even get a quarter way through. (Although, personally, I am fine with it because I DID complete three short stories, which I can now use for my MFA applications.) ... and speaking of MFA applications, UT-Austin, Ohio State, Brown, Cornell and Wash-U officially have my complete application. Five down and seven to go (I've decided to apply to all 12 on my original list ). Now that the writing samples are all done and in great shape, I might go ahead and submit them all before the end of the week. Although, that is a little contingent on if my bank account can handle it.

In 2006, I got my bachelor's degree. In 2008, I finished my master's. Two-thousand and nine? Spent three months in an alternative teaching certification course. And now in 2010, I'm thinking I went about this whole education thing the wrong way and need even more  school. To be fair, I don't think any of my degrees, or classes, have been useless. I believe ultimately they will all play a role in what I do long-term in life and each class was training to help me succeed. But I also feel like none of it has geared me for what I really want to do... especially since I'm feeling a little confused on that myself. Right now I'm on the fence about going after my MFA in Creative Writing or not. If you asked me what I wanted to be when I was five-year-old, I probably would have said Anne of Green Gables. Something about red hair, green-grey eyes, and being a quirky Canadian sounded ideal to me. I no longer want to be Anne--or at least not literally. I've always...

Earlier today I decided to be a bit more productive than I usually am after my 4-hour stint at my part-time job and made my way to the bookstore hoping to find some "direction." Ever since I lost my magazine job (and to be honest, even a few months before then), I've been feeling a bit jaded and confused. I'm suddenly wondering if what I always wanted to do with my life is what I'm supposed  to be doing, and asking myself if the profession I've always dreamed of pursing since I was about five-years-old is really for me. What if I'm honestly just no good at it? What if I just thought  I was? I had one day left on my "birthday gift" from Borders (I got a free raspberry-lemony iced tea!), so it seemed like the place to be. In the reference section, I grabbed a Writer's Market hoping to discover a few new avenues and alleys I never thought to walk down before. In the job section, I found "Fired to Hired," which I embarrassingly picked ...

Two weeks ago, I turned 25. It should have been a fabulous day, but turning a quarter of a century was far from what I had imagined it'd be. Ten years ago, I thought by 25 I'd be married to a tall, dark and handsome man; living in a cute town home or flat in a cool, hip city; navigating my way through an amazing career as an author, or at least an assistant editor... Basically I didn't think I'd be a loser. And let's face it... currently that's kind of what I am. I have my masters, and I work part-time taking care of other people's children, who can be very precious, but also very snotty. I am very, very single--the guys I want to be interested in me don't even want to be friends, and the ones I don't are borderline stalking me through Skype, Facebook, Twitter and/or MySpace. I do  live in a pretty cute and cozy apartment in a somewhat hip part of the city... except without a full-time job, I really can't afford it anymore and could easily ...